Weekly Weigh In – I’m officially at a plateau…..

*sigh*  This past Tuesday was probably the worse “binge” day I’ve had since starting this journey back in May.  Not only did I have way to much chocolate cake at work but I ate the In N Out fries my kid didn’t eat that night AND finished his strawberry shake.  And I didn’t work out that evening because that is the evening that I take The Boy to hockey lessons.

The next day, I felt like a weighed down beached whale.  I have to keep reminding myself I am no where NEAR the maintenance point yet, where I can binge every once in a while like that.  I still have a good 50 more lbs to drop.

What happened Tuesday, must never happen again.

Anyway, what were today’s results??

 Nothing this week 😦

Total: 55 lbs lost as of May 4, 2013! 

LilySlim Weight charts

Once again, I have lost nothing.  So, I believe that I’m officially at a plateau.  Today, I lost nothing.  Last week, I lost 2 and the week before, I lost nothing.

And I feel that I have so much further to go.  I know that I’ve come so far but sometimes it seems that the end of this road is getting further and further away with each step of progression I achieve.  It’s such a weird psychological phenomenon.

I need to purchase another 10 weeks at the medical clinic but I may have to put that on hold as I need to find the money from somewhere.  I do want to keep getting the Vitamin injections.  I’m not one to be disciplined enough to take vitamins every day so getting the injections weekly is good for me.  I will have to see what I can do or how I can budget it since now, I owe my step-grandmother about $900 on her Care Credit card that paid for my cat’s hospitalization and meds.

One thing that I haven’t put up in a while is BMI

BMI at starting weight:

BMI 42

BMI at current weight:

BMI 32 190 lbs

I am amazed that I’m STILL in the “Obese” section.  I guess a size 10 is considered obese now?!

But that is what I’m talking about when I say this just seems like a VERY long road.  What weighs heavy on my mind is that I absolutely CAN NOT go back to being fat.  There is WAY to much at risk.  And in all honesty, I made it that way with this blog, with kind of  bragging to others about a significant weight loss.  I gain that all back and I’m just a loser.  I know, I’m not really, it’s just what my inner brain tells me.  So in a way, it’s GOOD that I’ve put myself in this place.  It holds me accountable and that is what is keeping my progression going.

More importantly, The Boy deserves a healthier mom.  I can’t let that kid down.

I must keep losing and stay on track.  There is more at stake here than just looks.  I need to figure out how to get out of this stagnant place.  I am literally 1 lb away from exiting another number milestone.  I might change up my exercise?  Or maybe just not binge on In N Out fries and Strawberry shakes…yeah THAT may be the answer!  Sheesh!

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